I had a baby. And it took me a year and a half to get myself back. Man, as a person who’s always wanted to believe that somehow I can do it all, have it all, be it all, at all times…it’s not easy to admit that.
We welcomed our beautiful Bernadette into the world on January 2nd, 2015 and she absolutely lit up our home with joy. But I kept thinking, how do people do all of this?
How in the world do you care for your child, maintain and grow your relationship with your partner, oh, and go to your job every day. Hobbies? What hobbies? Who can care about hobbies?
Last summer, our window boxes were bare. The garden that made me fall in love with this house made me feel overwhelmed with it’s weeds and work. Our chicken coop stayed closed and empty. Looking at Home to Homestead caused a sick, guilty feeling in my stomach.
Jay said to me gently, “Don’t you want to do those things anymore?”
And I cried and said, “I can’t.”
I was working, and pumping, and nursing, and not sleeping, and still wearing maternity clothes and frustrated with the food allergies and eczema that forced me and my child to severely limit our diets.
I had no time for hobbies. I had no time for me. And I wondered if the things that I loved to do before baby would ever be fun for me again.
But as Bernie began to grow, I started to realize that she is part of me. And I can teach her to love the things I love. And that my happy places can become our happy places. So here we are. Starting from scratch.
Slowly but surely, our little Homestead is coming back to life. And almost exactly a year and half after we brought baby Bernadette home, I took her to pick up four soft, chirping, tiny chicks. And just as I’d hoped, she was even more delighted than her mama.
We documented the arrival of our new chicks on Twin Cities Live. You can watch the video below!